There are a few things you need to know when doing business here in Bali. First it’s not easy to find a reputable Factory that can actually produce what you ask for without getting completely ripped off.

And secondly you need to have the mental strength and no fear attitude of a Jedi Warrior if you’re going to ride a motorbike here. That is the only way to get around.

So today I had a meeting in Sanur to meet with a woman who through a mutual friend told me her Factory could do just what I needed. Now Sanur is an hour away from my place and through past experience I know I’m in for an extremely gnarly roadblock.

The other thing you need to know is that the police are always trying to pull you over to extort money from you and if you don’t have a drivers license (which I don’t and never will) you are screwed if you get caught — so I’m a tad nervous about this trip because I know what I’m going to have to do.

I’m only 10 minutes from my place when the first unexpected Roadblock is in front of me but this one is a piece of cake to run, only a few cops on the side of the road and I never make eye contact and just la la la la keep going.

Now I’m one traffic light away from what I like to call a suicide mission. There is a couple on a bike next to me and I warn them about what is up ahead and tell them I’m going to try and run it and they have already been pulled over earlier in the day and paid $50 so they say they will follow me.

I was in no way prepared for what I was about to encounter.

The police had upped their game and I kid you not there were at least 15 cops blocking the Bypass with arms outstretched. Insanity overtook logic and I ducked down, found enough space between 2 cops and floored it.

They screamed and I got out of there like a bat out of Hell not knowing if they were chasing me. This is kind of like an out of body experience that I’m sure the couple on the bike behind me are still talking about. Needless to say I made it unscathed and uncaught.

The meeting with the Factory woman by the way was a bust.

She had too many clients and couldn’t fit me in.

Oh well — I spent the day on the beach under an umbrella imbibing in Bintang and freshly caught fish. The Sunset was glorious.

Oh and no roadblocks on the way home.